今天跟你们分享一首我最近在单曲循环的歌，Finneas O’Connell的Let’s Fall in Love for the Night. 节目全文可关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 let's fall in love获取 Finneas就是Billie Eillish的亲哥，真的是个宝藏男孩啊，很多歌都很好听，今年也才23岁。 他常说“Billie has the most beautiful voice I’ve ever heard.”一直都帮妹妹一起写歌，其实自己也非常有才华，被很多人忽略了。 Alright, go back to the song, Let’s Fall in Love for the Night. It was inspired by a girl Finneas never met in person. Talking to Billboard, Finneas says he was in Osaka, Japan, FaceTiming a girl he’s never met and knowing there was nothing he could really do about it. So he wrote the song about the day he would fantasize having with her. 这首歌其实讲的是关于Finneas幻象和一个一直在聊天但从没见过面的女孩儿见面后会发生的故事。 他当时在日本大阪和她FaceTime，却没办法见面，启发了他写下这首歌。 歌里说的是： Let's fall in love for the night 今夜让我们坠入爱河 And forget in the morning 明日便相忘于江湖 You need to pick me up 你需要载我一同上路 I'll be there in twenty five 与你相处的时光我贪多无厌 I like to push my luck 我偏爱得寸进尺 So take my hand, let's take a drive 所以就牵起我的手一齐开车兜风吧 他幻想和她一起开车兜风 I've been living in the future 我一直对未来满怀憧憬 Hoping I might see you sooner 希冀着不久后便能见你容颜 I want you, right at shotgun I knew 我想要你乘坐在车副驾 When I got one right 我知道你就是我的命中注定 （双关one right原指副驾驶位 此处亦指对的人） 尽管 You won't stay with me, I know 我深知你不会为我停留 But you can let away with me until you go 但在离去之前你还有时间对我敞开心扉 很像《爱在黎明破晓前》，他们只是聊天、爱上了彼此但最后没办法在一起。不一样的是爱在系列有后续还结婚了。而Let’s Fall in Love for the Night只有“You won’t stay with me, I know.”—我知道你不会为我停留。 歌里提到了I like to push my luck, so take my hand and let’s take a drive.想要得寸进尺、让自己再幸运一些，牵起我的手一起开车兜风吧。 这句其实跟他发布的上一首歌Luck Pusher是互相呼应的。 Finneas says, They do reference each other a bit! “If you’re bad odds, I’m a luck pusher” and “I like to push my luck” -- it feels like two songs that know that the other one exists. Luck Pusher也很好听，这两首放在一起的话会发现讲的可能是同一个故事。 它的歌词是： On again, off again 开开关关 That's the way it's always been for you and me 这就是你我一起的方式 Fall in love, fall apart 分分合合 Draw the circle 'till you start to see 这段感情画上一个圈，直到你能看见我的爱 You don't make it easy for me to stay or try to leave 你让我难以做出离开的选择 I don't take it easy, had to walk away if it's killing me 我很难受，如果这份爱让我窒息，我便离开 If you're bad odds then I'm a luck pusher 如果你是不幸的那么我会是好运的推动者 Better off, later on when the rain has come and gone, and we've ran dry 幸运的是，一场雨过后我们又分开了 We can both find our own place to live and love and die 我们都可以找到属于各自的地方去生活，去爱，直至死去 是不是很像五月天《突然好想你》的那句歌词 --为何我们还是要奔向各自的幸福和遗憾中老去。 写的都是那个想在一起却没办法在一起的人。 好吧今天就分享到这儿啦，Finneas的其他歌也很多很好听的，强烈推荐你们去听一听。预祝周末愉快。

周末去看了《小妇人》 Little Women. The movie was set in 1860s in Concord, New Hampshire, in the aftermath of the American Civil War. It follows the lives of four sisters, Jo, Meg, Amy, and Beth. （抱歉最近出差和工作耽误了节目更新，这周开始恢复更新，谢谢听友们的等待。） 节目的中英文全文可关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 小妇人 获取 故事发生在19世纪60年代美国南北战争期的Concord，New Hampshire州的首府。当时因为战争把男性都召上了战场，脱离了生产，越来越多的女性开始摆脱传统家庭束缚，投身社会劳动和政治。 当时看完电影只觉得对Jo和Laurie没在一起意难平。 （没看过小说原著，仅从电影剧情上聊） Jo and Laurie met at a party. Jo had scorched her dress so she didn’t join the dancing party. Laurie didn’t laugh at her. They turned out dancing happily outside of the party room. Jo和Laurie最开始认识是因为在一个舞会上，Jo烧焦了自己的裙子不好意思出去跳舞，而Laurie就陪着她很开心在屋子外面跳起了舞。 他们见面后Jo说的第一句话就为后面的故事埋下了伏笔。 Jo说的是：I can’t get over my disappointment in being a girl. 我真的很失望为什么我是一个女生。 当时的社会环境认为女性应该完全依附于男性。 出版商Mr. Dashwood就直接对投稿的Jo说: If the main character is a girl, make sure she is married by the end. Or dead. Either way. 如果故事的主角是个女生,请确保她最后要么结婚了,要么死了。 So Jo at that time was very very afraid of being married. She said she supposed marriage has always been an economic proposition. It’s mercenary, and has nothing to do with romance. 当时的Jo是很恐惧婚姻的。她觉得婚姻是女性对男性的屈服，是功利主义。 在姐妹Meg结婚的时候Jo的反应也很激烈。 She said to Meg--We can leave right now. I can make money. I’ll sell stories. I’ll do anything…And you, you should be an actress, and you should have a life on the stage. 她觉得Meg应该成为一名舞台上闪闪发光的女演员，而不是走进婚姻。对那时候的Jo来说婚姻是对事业的抹杀，而她热爱自己的写作事业。 所以当时Meg结婚后，Laurie对Jo的深情表白遭到了残忍拒绝。 Laurie said to Jo, I have loved you ever since I’ve known you, Jo. I couldn’t help it. And I tried to show it, and you wouldn’t let me, which is fine. But I must make you hear now, and give me an answer, because I cannot go on like this any longer! I gave up billiards [ˈbɪljərdz]. I gave up everything you didn’t like. I’m happy I did. It’s fine, and I waited, and I never complained, because I figured you’d love me, Jo. And I realize I’m not half good enough, and I’m not this great man. 他能感觉到Jo也是爱他的，想跟她在一起。但Jo却说： You’re a great deal too good for me. And I’m so grateful to you, and I’m so proud of you. And I just , I don’t see why I can’t love you as you want me to. 我只是没办法以你希望我爱你的方式爱你。 Jo: Listen, you’ll find some lovely accomplished girl, who will love you and adore you. And she’s going to make a fine mistress [ˈmɪstrəs] for your fine house. But I wouldn’t, alright? 你会找到那个可爱的出色的崇拜你的女孩，会成为你豪宅的女主人。但我不会。 And we would quarrel, because we can’t help it, even now. I’d hate elegant society, you’d hate my scribbling [ˈskrɪblɪŋ]. And we would be unhappy…Teddy, I don’t believe I will ever marry. I’m happy as I am. And I love my liberty too well to be in any hurry to give it up. 我们会争吵，我不会喜欢上层社会的做派，你不会喜欢我乱写东西，我们在一起不会开心的。 我热爱自由，不认为自己会结婚。 Laurie却说：I think you will marry, Jo. I think you’ll find someone, and love them, and you will live and die for them, because that’s your way, and you will. And I’ll watch. Laurie最后这句“我会看着的”真是心酸。 其实Jo说的“I’d hate elegant society”不喜欢做作优雅的上流社会做派，从他们第一次在party屋子外面独自跳舞就可以看出，Laurie也不迎合这些虚伪的东西，这方面他们并没有不合适。只是Jo单纯地不想结婚。 她爱Laurie吗？我认为是爱的。 在Jo经历了Beth去世回家后，已经七年过去了。 Jo对她妈妈说：Perhaps I was too quick in turning him down, Laurie. 我当时拒绝Laurie拒绝得太快了。 Her mom asked her: Do you love him? Jo said: If he asked me again I think I would say yes. Do you think he’ll ask me again? 如果Laurie再问一次是否爱他，Jo会说Yes。 妈妈还反问了一句 But do you love him? Jo说I care more to be loved. I want to be loved. “我更在意被爱。我想要被爱。”很多人听到这里觉得Jo只是受了打击为了被爱而回来找Laurie，但Jo后面解释了她对女性地位低下的无奈，这里她说的I want to be loved，我认为其实指的是I want to be loved, and respected. Jo的下一段说的是： You know, I just feel like, women, they have minds, and they have souls, as well as just hearts. And they’ve got ambition, and they’ve got talent, as well as just beauty. And I’m so sick of people saying that love is just all a woman is fit for. I’m so sick of it! But I’m so lonely! 女性也有想法、有灵魂、有野心、有天赋，而不只是美貌。Jo很烦大家都说爱情是女性的全部。她觉得很孤单。 这也回应了她之前不接受婚姻的理由，害怕自己的才华被婚姻埋没。 而后来Jo已经有了转变，因为她发现比起令人恐惧的结婚，她更害怕的，是失去Laurie。 Jo wrote a letter to Laurie seven years later after she returned home. My dear Teddy, I miss you more than I can express. I used to think that the worst fate was to be a wife. I was young and stupid. But now I have changed. The worst fate is to live my life without you in it. I was wrong to turn you down and run away to New York. 但很可惜，当时Laurie已经和Jo的妹妹Amy结婚了，Jo的信Laurie也没机会看到了。 Laurie明明也还爱着Jo。重聚的时候当Jo很开心跟他说Oh Teddy you’re back! Laurie问：Are you glad to see me then? Jo说：Yes! Laurie淡淡说了一句：Oh I was worried.我想太多了。也就是Laurie以为这七年来Jo并不想见他。 到后来和Jo最后在一起的Friedrich教授出现后，Laurie反复问了三四遍， Who’s this? Who are you? Can someone tell me who this is? I’m Laurie. Who are you? --你是谁？Laurie并不想接受教授的出现。 再到把Jo送上马车追Feirdrich，Laurie依靠在扶梯很失落。 那Laurie爱Amy吗？也爱，但更多的是享受被爱吧。 他在告诉Jo自己结婚了的时候，对Jo说： I‘ve always loved you. But the love I feel for Amy, it’s different. You’re the only one that ever calls me that, Jo, “Teddy.” Amy calls me “My lord.” Jo是唯一一个叫Laurie “Teddy”的人，就像一起的玩伴。但Amy叫他“My lord”我的殿下。 Laurie自幼失去父母，很缺爱。而Amy从最开始就默默爱Laurie，为了他不跟富人Fred结婚；用一句“I despise you”骂醒了失去Jo以后花天酒地的Laurie。等了七年Jo的Laurie也是累了吧，接受了“被爱”。 所幸Jo最后也找到了适合自己的Feirdrich教授——懂她对写作的热爱，最开始就匿名送了《莎士比亚三部曲》，作为评论家也能在写作上给Jo提供帮助。 It seems like they all have a happy ending. But I think it’s all about timing. Meet the right one, at the right time.看起来他们似乎都有了美好的结局，虽然有很多遗憾。其实就是对的时间，对的人，缺一不可。

》》》》》》》》一键领取入口《《《《《《《 之前我们聊了Taylor新专首单cardigan，今天来聊聊另两首跟这首歌密切相关的歌。 【节目中英文全文可以关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 abc 获取】 【英文参考】 Taylor once explained in a YouTube Q&A celebrating the album’s release that“These three songs explore a love triangle from all three people’s perspectives at different times in their lives.” Cardigan is told by a woman named Betty. She is now a grown woman and looks back on her younger self. So maybe like twenty years later, Betty still remembers being lost, and she says her ex, James, made her feel insecure at that time. Chase two girls, lose the one When you are young, they assume you know nothing. But I knew everything when I was young. 追求两个女生，失去了其中一个 当你年轻，人们总以为你什么都不知道 但其实我当时什么都知道

》》》》》》》》一键领取入口《《《《《《《 【节目的中英文全文可以关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 三十而已 获取】 最近《三十而已》不知道你们追了没有。陈屿这个角色或许让很多男生有共鸣，也听到很多女生吐槽说自己的另一半就是这样的性格。 陈屿明明是个很温暖的人，他会偷偷帮晓芹装婴儿车，生日会大费周折订网红餐厅，没了孩子偷偷掉眼泪等等，却总是很少表述出来以获取别人的理解。所以就像他的名字一样，活得像座孤岛。 【英文参考】 He has an unhealthy attachment style due to his past trauma in childhood. He was neglected by his parents as his mother only focused on Chen Yu’s younger brother. Psychologist Dr. Lisa Firestone says, children who always failed to meet their needs will form an avoidant attachment style. They develop a sense of shame, thinking, “I am not worth paying attention to.” Then they disconnect from their needs in an effort to avoid feeling this shame. 在陈屿小的时候，妈妈似乎只关注他的弟弟，连鸡蛋被弟弟砸了，自己委屈被骂，也只能默默承受。心理学家博主Dr. Lisa Firestone说，当人在童年的时候经常感觉自己的需求没有被关注和满足，就可能形成逃避型的依恋模式。 They may learn that the best way to deal with their frustration at not having their needs met is to act like they don’t have any. 为了回避感觉到这种被拒的“Shame”羞耻、尴尬，他们可能会装作自己没有任何需求，这样就不会体会到任何的失落感。 They want to be in a relationship, but they resist experiencing or showing any need for emotional closeness. They may have a tendency to seek out isolation, emotionally distancing themselves from their partner. They can appear to be more focused on themselves and to value their priorities above their partner’s. They can seem cool, often showing annoyance when their partner is expressing feelings or needs, believing their partner is being “childish” or “dramatic.” 他们想在一段关系里，却不想展示出自己的亲密性的真实需求。经常会想要独处、关注自己的需求要高于另一半的需求、当伴侣表达出了他们的感受和需求，因为共情能力低，他们可能觉得对方太幼稚、太”作”。 就像晓芹怀孕撒娇说想喝酸梅汤，陈屿就只说了句”别闹了。” But actually they’re just scared of being hurt and feeling shameful. This way, they never let anybody hurt them — even though they end up alone anyway. 其实他们仅仅是害怕受伤、尴尬。这种逃避型的防御机制可能不会让任何人伤害自己，却也很难让别人真正地走进自己。 So, how to overcome an insecure avoidant attachment style? Berit Brogaard says on Psychology Today that first of all, you need to find out who you can trust and who you cannot trust. 怎么样才能克服这种逃避型依恋模式呢？Dr. Berit Brogaard在Psychology Today的博文里写道，首先要找出那些你可以信任的人。 Maybe you can make a list of your deepest secrets, listing the most unimportant secrets first, which are those people don’t know about but would not destroy your reputation. Start by sharing these unimportant or less important secrets with people you think you can potentially trust. That way, you can find out whether you can actually trust them. 比如说可以列一堆自己的秘密，从无关紧要的秘密开始写起。就是那些不影响你个人声誉的、不那么重要的秘密。然后有机会的时候和你觉得可以信任的人分享。这个步骤就已经很需要勇气了，但可以让别人了解自己更多、让彼此靠近。 And secondly, confront people by speaking up immediately (not 10 days later). Don’t ever change yourself for the sake of pleasing another person. Tell people what you like and don’t like. It’s OK to feel the shame. 第二点，直面问题和人，在当下做沟通，而不是等个十来二十天或者别人不提起的话永远不说。 就像《How to Stop Feeling Like Shit》《如何停止不开心》中作者Andrea Owen就分享过“逃避“这一个坏习惯是如何让你不开心的。 She says that you may have compiled your list: meditation, yoga, follow this person on Instagram, and read all the books. But here’s what I know to be true: that checklist won’t make you happy and joyful. The "answer" — the key to your happiness — lies in connecting the dots from your past to your current behavior and shining the light on things that hurt. It’s about facing the obstacles, working through and processing them, and loving yourself along the way. 你可能会跟着心灵鸡汤博主看一堆书、做瑜伽、冥想等等等等，可做完了发现还是不开心。因为如果你没有直面让你受伤的问题，只是选择逃避，它永远不会被解决。 像陈屿，其实他就算在挽留晓芹的阶段，也只是自己暴吃零食放松，都没有直面问题去做沟通，反倒是他弟弟找晓芹出来聊天帮他哥解释清楚了，不然估计也没有后续了。 当然了，另一方面晓芹也有她的问题，她之前始终没有耐心听陈屿解释，像衣服为什么要分开洗那么小的疑问也都憋着很久不过问，最后只剩下劈头盖脸的发泄。 So if you’re having an avoidant partner, try to practice patience when he or she pushes you away. Communicate with words, not tantrums. Ask for what you want rather than complaining about what you don’t want. If you chase people who need space, they will likely run even faster or turn and fight. When people with avoidant personality withdraw, let them. 所以如果你遇到了有逃避型依恋模式的人，在ta推开你的时候多给ta一些耐心。用语言而不是情绪做沟通。当对方需要空间，就给ta空间，不要逼对方立马做出回应，否则对方只会可能跑得更快。 Once they realize that they are safe and intimacy will not cause them the same pain they experienced as a child, a healthier relationship may be reaffirmed through time. 当ta感觉到安全，并且知道这份亲密不会像比如童年时期的经历那样带给ta痛苦，一段更健康的关系或许就能慢慢地形成了。 看陈屿和晓芹最后复合了，一方面为他们开心，另一方面也希望深爱着彼此的他们能找到适合他们的沟通模式。 你有没有类似的经历和感触呢？留言和我们分享吧。 【节目的中英文全文可以关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 三十而已 获取】

》》》》》》》》一键领取入口《《《《《《《 上回聊《肖申克的救赎》没聊完，这回接着聊。 肖申克监狱其实就是社会大熔炉，本是银行家的Andy进去以后一无所有，最后他却能打败处在监狱食物链顶端的大boss监狱长。他是怎么一步步做到的？有哪些值得我们学习的？ 【中英文全文可以关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 肖申克的救赎 获取】 【英文参考】 Well first of all, Andy knows how to make allies to help him achieve his goal. In the Shawshank prison, everything is clear. If you are not able to make allies, you are in trouble. Red is a man who knows the best how to get things: from rock hammers, posters of Rita Hayworth, to the pieces of rocks, Red supplies it all. And these stuff later become Andy’s tools to dig the tunnel and escape from the prison. ---- Two things never happened again after that. The Sisters never laid a finger on Andy again... and Bogs never walked again. They transferred him to a minimum security hospital upstate. To my knowledge, he lived out the rest of his days drinking his food through a straw. ---- Andy Dufresne: I wouldn't say friends. I'm a convicted murderer who provides sound financial planning - it's a wonderful pet to have. ---- I remember thinking it would take a man six hundred years to tunnel through the wall with it. Old Andy did it in less than twenty. Andy crawled to freedom through five hundred yards of shit smelling foulness I can't even imagine, or maybe I just don't want to. Five hundred yards...that's the length of five football fields. ---- My wife used to say I'm a hard man to know. Like a closed book. Complained about it all the time...She was beautiful. God I loved her. I just didn't know how to show it, that's all. I killed her, Red. I didn't pull the trigger, but I drove her away. And that's why she died, because of me. 【中英文全文可以关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 肖申克的救赎 获取】

》》》》》》》》一键领取入口《《《《《《《 节目的中英文全文可以关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 love 获取 【英文参考】 I'm sorry, don't leave me, I want you here with me 抱歉，请不要离开我，此刻我只想你陪着我 I know that your love is gone 尽管我明白你的爱已经消逝殆尽 I can't breathe, I'm so weak, I know this isn't easy 我无法呼吸，脆弱不堪，我知道接受事实的不易 Don't tell me that your love is gone 别亲口对我说你的爱已经消失殆尽 Apparently this is about a breakup story. But SLANDER says they didn’t focus too much on the lyrics, instead they simply want to impress listeners by the melody. Most of their initial inspiration comes from the vocals themselves, but for“Love Is Gone,”in particular,they just wanted to write the saddest piano piece they had ever written, then the vocal came second. Their rule for the emotional records is that if it doesn’t make us cry, it’s not done yet.They just really let the emotions and feeling guide them.

》》》》》》》》一键领取入口《《《《《《《 今天我们来重温下豆瓣评分Top1的经典影片《肖申克的救赎》The Shawshank Redemption. 之前也聊过这部，但看了很多遍，每次看都有新的启发。 【抱歉这个月我出差没有周末连轴转..所以可能更新频次会受影响。但我会尽量多更新的，谢谢你们的支持！】 节目全文可以关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 肖申克1 获取 For those of you that may have forgetten the plots of the movie: In 1947, Andy Dufresne, a banker in Maine, is convicted of murdering his wife and her lover. Since the state of Maine has no death penalty, he is given two consecutive life sentences and sent to the notoriously harsh Shawshank Prison. Andy keeps claiming his innocence, but no one believes in him. Twenty years later, he successfully escaped from the prison. At the beginning, Red says, “Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane.” Because he was rejected to be released a few times, and have been waiting several decades in the prison to get the parole. He had lost his hope. There was a time Andy sneaked into the broadcasting room, locked the door, and played opera for the entire prison, sitting there, simply enjoying the music. He was, of course, punished for his malfeasance. But he was very proud of himself. I have no idea to this day what those two Italian ladies were singing about. Truth is, I don't want to know. Some things are best left unsaid. I'd like to think they were singing about something so beautiful, it can't be expressed in words, and makes your heart ache because of it. I tell you, those voices soared higher and farther than anybody in a gray place dares to dream. It was like some beautiful bird flapped into our drab little cage and made those walls dissolve away, and for the briefest of moments, every last man in Shawshank felt free.

》》》》》》》》一键领取入口《《《《《《《 昨天看到一个热搜说 Taylor Swift压中了北京高考题，英语完形填空有一道是in your wildest_____答案是 dreams. 哈哈~ 今天我们就来聊聊这首很好听很野性的Wildest Dreams. 【节目的中英文全文 可以关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 taylor mv即可】 Taylor wrote the song in her album, 1989. She says it reflects on romance in a different way to her previous love songs. Taylor说这首歌的灵感，是来源于一段刚开始就看到了结局的恋爱。但这段感情让她改变了自己对爱情的看法。 She says in a Rolling Stone interview, "I think the way I used to approach relationships was very idealistic. I used to go into them thinking, 'Maybe this is the one - we'll get married and have a family, this could be forever. Whereas now I go in thinking, 'How long do we have on the clock - before something comes along and puts a wrench in it, or your publicist calls and says this isn't a good idea?" "That's actually a really good example of the way I go into relationships now. If I meet someone who I feel I have a connection with, the first thought I have is: 'When this ends, I hope it ends well. I hope you remember me well.' Which is not anything close to the way I used to think about relationships. It's that realization that it's the anomaly if something works out; it's not a given."

》》》》》》》》一键领取入口《《《《《《《 又到了一年一度紧张的高考期，考完的学弟学妹们很快又要开始大学四年的旅程了。想和你们分享一部很经典的探讨教育的印度电影 Three Idiots. 中文名叫《三个白痴》/《三傻大闹宝莱坞》。 【节目中英文文本可关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 三个白痴 获取】 【英文参考】 The film follows the friendship of three students, Rancho, Farhan, and Raju at an Indian engineering college. It is a satire about the social pressures under an Indian education system, which is quite similar to the Chinese one as well. Life is a race. If you don't run fast, you'll get trampled. He says that life begins with murder, if you don't compete, you will die, even to be born, we had to race 300 million sperm. But with his highly stressful education concept, one of the most talented students at the college has committed to suicide simply because he failed to pass the final exam. These engineers are very smart, sir, they didn't invent a machine which can measure the pressure on the brain. If they had, we would have come to know that this was not a suicide but a Murder. It is true that most people need a diploma to get a job, to have a good life. But only a diploma is not enough. It is not the diploma that matters, but the learning journey.

》》》》》》》》一键领取入口《《《《《《《 最近高分悬疑剧《隐秘的角落》不知道你们看了没有。小说原著的名字是《坏小孩》The Bad Kids. 【节目中英文全文 可关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 隐秘的角落】 【英文参考】 It is a web drama adaptation of a suspense novel from a popular Chinese mystery fiction writer known by the pseudonym Zijin Chen. Zijin Chen’s parents got a divorce when he was nine. And his dad remarried and had a daughter. He says he truly understands how children growing up in a single-parent family feel. According to research organization Child Trends, science supports the idea that warmth and affection expressed by parents to their children results in life-long positive outcomes for those children. Higher self-esteem, improved academic performance, better parent-child communication, and fewer psychological and behavior problems have been linked to this type of affection. On the other hand, children who do not have affectionate parents tend to have lower self esteem and to feel more alienated, hostile, aggressive, and anti-social. In 2010, researchers at Duke University Medical School found that babies with very affectionate and attentive mothers grow up to be happier, more resilient, and less anxious adults. affectionate [əˈfekʃənət] 充满爱的 Attentive [əˈtentɪv] 体贴的 The psychologists rated the mother’s affection and attention level on a five-point scale ranging from “negative” to “extravagant.” Nearly 10 percent of the mothers showed low levels of affection, 85 percent demonstrated a normal amount of affection, and about six percent showed high levels of affection. Then 30 years later, those same individuals were interviewed about their emotional health. The adults whose mothers showed “extravagant” or “caressing” affection were much less likely than the others to feel stressed and anxious. They were also less likely to report hostility and distressing social interactions. 30年后，对这些人进行了有关其情绪健康的采访。母亲表现出“过度”或“爱抚”的成年人比其他成年人感到压力和焦虑的可能性要小得多，也没有出现敌对和令人沮丧的社会互动。 The researchers involved in this study concluded that the hormone[ˈhɔːməʊn] oxytocin [,ɔksi'təusin, -'tɔ-] may be responsible for this effect. Oxytocin is a chemical in the brain released during times when a person feels love and connection. It has been shown to help parents bond with their children, adding a sense of trust and support between them. This bond most likely helps our brain produce and use oxytocin, causing a child to feel more positive emotions. So the greatest gift parents can give their children is to love them. I highly agree that parents should take a responsibility test before they have kids cuz not everyone can be a “fit parent.” 【有“敏感词”提示放不了全文，节目中英文全文 可关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 隐秘的角落】

上一期《乘风破浪的姐姐》很多人都在关注艾瑞巴蒂组里面几个强势姐姐+弱势组长合作不来的情况。为什么她们几个那么难合作呢？ 这也让我想到了哈佛商学院教授Amy Edmondson分享过的一个TED演讲叫 《如何让陌生人组成一个团队》--How to turn a group of strangers into a team. 【节目全文可关注微信公众号 Zoey八点英语 回复 合作】 【英文参考】 In 2010, a massive collapse at San José Copper Mine in Chile left 33 men trapped half a mile below some of the hardest rock in the world. No drilling technology in the industry is capable of getting through rock that hard and that deep fast enough to save their lives. It's not clear if the miners are alive. And it's not even clear who's in charge. Yet, within 70 days, all 33 of these men were brought to the surface alive. First of all, they’re very humble and curious. They were able to be humble in the face of the very real challenge ahead, curious -- all of these diverse individuals, diverse expertise especially, nationality as well, were quite curious about what each other brings. And they were willing to take risks to learn fast what might work. They have overcome what we call the basic human challenge: it's hard to learn if you already know. And unfortunately, we're hardwired to think we know. And so we've got to remind ourselves to be curious about what others bring. And secondly, it's awfully hard to team if you see others as competitors. Abraham Lincoln said once, "I don't like that man very much. I must get to know him better." Think about that -- I don't like him, that means I don't know him well enough. It's extraordinary. This is the mindset we need for effective teaming. When we step back and reach out and reach across, miracles can happen. 背景音乐：Undo

周日就是父亲节了。今天和你们分享一部和父亲有关的经典电影，《大鱼》Big Fish。 【 中英文全文 可关注微信公众号Zoey八点英语 回复 大鱼】 【英文参考】 The movie is adopted from the novel Big Fish. It tells the story about a father named Edward Bloom, who loves telling stories about his eccentric life, such as meetings with a giant man, two Korean conjoined twins who are singers, a witch with a glass eye capable of seeing the future, and a big fish that refuses to be captured. His son Will didn’t believe his stories. But when Edward fell ill, Will finally started his journey to dig into his father’s past. Will’s dad always says he was fishing on the day Will was born. But then when Will went to the hospital to visit his dad when he was very ill, the doctor finally told him the true story on the day he was born. He said actually Will’s father was very sorry to miss Will’s delivery because he was on a business trip. So he made up the fishing story for Will. Edward said: This town is more than any man could ask for. And if I were to end up here, I'd consider myself lucky. But the truth, I'm not ready to end up anywhere. Jenny asked: How are you gonna make it without your shoes? Edward replied: I suspect it would hurt, a lot. The more difficult something became, the more rewarding it was in the end. 背景音乐：Forest Gump Suite