When Ross Showalter turned 18 and began dating hearing men, he found himself communicating with them on their terms: using spoken language. Years of speech lessons and lip-reading practice forced Ross, who is Deaf, to conform to a society that favors sound. All of these men made the same promise: to learn sign language, only to never follow through.

Then, on a spring day in the midst of the pandemic, Ross met Will. Will vowed to shatter the pattern of false promises that had haunted Ross’s dating life.

Today, we invite you to carefully listen to Ross’s story, read by the Deaf actor Joshua Castille. Then, stick around to hear host Anna Martin catch up with Ross. Ross explains why it’s so powerful for him to communicate in his own language — American Sign Language — and he shares an update on him and Will.

To access a transcript of this episode, click here. 

Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.