Making friends as you age



At school you're surrounded by people your own age. Of course you spend a lot of time with them, and so some of the best friendships are forged at school. But later in life, it's easy to lose touch – you work full-time, maybe start a family, and your old friends might be scattered across the country or even the world.



A 2016 study in Finland found that after the age of 25, the number of friends someone has falls very quickly, and this number continues to decrease throughout a person's life. So when you're in your mid-to-late 20s, how can you make new friends?



Radhika Sanghani, a BBC journalist, tasked herself with making new friends by saying 'yes' to any invitations that came her way. If a colleague asked her for lunch, she didn't shy away from it, and she soon made some of the closest friends she'd ever had. "We all message several times a week often leaving rambling voice notes; we host dinners at each other's houses; and we've all cried on each other at least once (the true mark of friendship)" she wrote in a 2018 article.



The website Talk Twenties recommends joining a local class or group, like taking up running or joining a choir. Having something in common gives you something to talk about with your new acquaintances, which will hopefully then translate into meaningful relationships. When you don't have mutual interests with someone, it can be difficult to get past the small talk stage, where conversation can quickly fizzle out, and a class can help avoid this.



Nowadays, there are also apps for meeting new people, like Bumble BFF or Meetup. Dr Robert Puff who writes for Psychology Today says solid friendships are essential for two main reasons. One is to help make life more enjoyable, and two is for support in difficult times – to make hardships more tolerable!



As we grow up, we can feel like we're not in control of what's happening around us, but we can control our social life, so enrich your life with fulfilling friendships.





词汇表

forge [fɔː(r)dʒ] 建立，缔造，形成

lose touch 失去联系

work full-time 全职工作

scattered  [ˈskætə(r)d] 分散的，离散的

Finland ['fɪnlənd] 芬兰

come one's way  （机会、好运等）偶然出现，来到

shy away 畏缩，回避

rambling ['ræmblɪŋ] 杂乱无章的，漫无边际的，冗长而含糊的

voice notes 语音消息

take up 开始从事（某项活动）

choir [ˈkwaɪə(r)] 唱诗班，合唱团

acquaintance [ə'kweɪntəns] 认识的人，熟人

mutual [ˈmjuːtʃuəl] 共有的，彼此的

small talk 闲聊，寒暄

fizzle out ['fɪz(ə)l] 以失败告终，告吹

BFF (Best Friends Forever) 永远的最好的朋友

solid friendship [ˈsɒlɪd] 牢固的友谊

hardship  [ˈhɑː(r)dʃɪp] 艰难，困难

tolerable [ˈtɒl(ə)rəb(ə)l] 可忍受的，过得去的

be in control of 掌控，控制



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