最近读了本书叫Nonviolent Communication《非暴力沟通》，估计很多听友也有读过吧~

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[ 重点英文参考 ] 

State the observations that are leading you to feel the need to say something. 

These should be purely factual observations, with no component of judgment or evaluation. 

People often disagree about evaluations because they value things differently, but facts provide a common ground for communication. 

State the feeling that the observation is triggering in you. Or, guess what the other person is feeling, and ask. 

State your need that is the cause of that feeling. 

Make a concrete request for action to meet the need.

Ask clearly and specifically for what you want right now, rather than hinting or stating only what you don't want.